Life
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Parenting Books Make Less Confident Parents

10 Ways to Raise Confident Children

20 Things Parents Can do to make their kids happier

8 Things Parents Today are Doing Wrong

Sound familiar?

Parenting books make less confidant parents. Why? Because instead of listening to your intuition, actively seeking a “village”, a group of people who can help you become a better person and parent, or reaching out to those who parent how we parent or would like to parent, books have convinced us that they know best.

Or google. What do you get when you google something. You get 2 extremes. “Eh. Don’t worry about it.” Or, my favorite. “OMG YOU’RE GOING TO DIE.” Totally reasonable. (In case you missed it, yes – that’s sarcasm.)

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There’s even books for parenting through vacations!

Then there is the stranger on the street. Who obviously knows how to parent your kids better than you do. And by you, I mean me. I seem to attract these people. Do I really look that overwhelmed? Is the yoga pants, crazy hair and kid smeared shirt not hip? (I HATE shopping. Mostly because these random strangers who like to approach me all the time about my toddler running around shaking hands with all the mannequins. She’s entertaining herself. Go away.) You bet, that totally happened.

We have so much information available to us now with just the click of a button or the turn of a page. We turn to the “experts” to tell us how to do life better. How to parent better. How to make our kids happier. Why? Because they’re the experts? What happened to talking with partners, friends or family about our lives to help us through our problems and concerns? When did community become an online activity instead of BEING together?

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Now I’m not saying that all of the information out there is bad or unhelpful. Some of it is sound advice and very helpful. I’m not saying that some people can’t or won’t benefit from reading a parenting book. Some will.

But the overwhelming amount of information and experts out there are killing a parents confidence in raising their own children. Instead of instilling the confidence in a parent to listen to their intuition and communicate effectively, we are telling them to go read a book. Go read what someone else has to say instead of listening to what the parent has to say.

Chances are, you are parenting better than you think. None of us are perfect. We all have bad days. We all wake up to try again. Chances are your kids don’t even notice the bad days. At the end of the day, ask them what they remember most about the day. I bet their answer will give you a smile.

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3 Comments

  1. I LOVE this! I totally agree that our village should be predominantly in real life. I do read articles such as the ones you mentioned and you’re right – they make me feel less confident and they can get so overwhelming. In the end it just feels like I’ve don’t everything wrong. Thank you for this article!

  2. Ashlee says

    I absolutely loved this! I rely on my sisters, my parents and my significant other when I have questions or concerns about my children. I do believe that most articles and books make us feel inadequate for the task. Well said!

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